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Sunday, October 11, 2015


A repost BYSTEPHEN ALTROGGE  Check out the link for more. 
Approximately 1 out of every 4 Christians will encounter adult onset Calvinism (commonly known as AOC) during their life, either personally or in someone close to them. It can be a scary thing to encounter, especially if you’re not familiar with the symptoms. The person you once knew and loved is suddenly a completely different person.
Don’t panic.
It gets better.
To help you navigate the treacherous waters of AOC, I’ve listed the possible symptoms you may encounter.
  • A sudden urge to correct everything and everyone all the time about every possible thing.
  • A growing conviction that every worship song you’ve ever sung is heretical and should be excised from the church catalog, including the Nicene Creed, Doxology, and most of the Psalms.
  • A strange and inexplicable ability to listen to 300 John Piper sermons in a single day.
  • A burning passion to convert everyone, especially your extremely godly parents WHO TAUGHT YOU THE BIBLE, to Calvinism.
  • A growing level of arrogance that is directly inverse to the number of blog posts you write about humility.
  • Constant cravings for cigars and microbrews, even though they make you incredibly sick.
  • Deep suspicion of anything that might cause the slightest bit of emotion in church, especially those awful worship songs noted above.
  • Deep-seated cynicism toward anyone who doesn’t take a hard stance on an issue, including but not limited to: free will, Calvinism, sports, coffee, the Trinity, capitalism, child schooling, and dating.
  • Being so smug you begin to panic that you won’t be able to adequately manifest all the smugness.
  • An unshakeable conviction that Tim Keller is too theologically soft.
  • The ability to bring every conversation full circle to Romans 9.
  • Frustration that guys like Piper and Sproul don’t draw more lines in the sand.
  • Inevitably arriving at the conclusion that John Calvin was not that strong of a Calvinist. At least, not as strong as you are.
  • Growing a beard, but not in a hipster way! This beard is WAY DIFFERENT from hipster beards, because it tapers to a point somewhere between the nipples, just like Calvin’s beard did.
If you or someone you know begins experiencing these symptoms, go to a pastor IMMEDIATELY. It won’t make the slightest bit of difference, because you were predestined to be a Calvinist, but still, you should probably see a pastor.
But don’t worry. After 5-6 years, these symptoms will subside and you or your loved one will return to being a mostly normal person.
Until then…sorry.

Thursday, September 3, 2015




I often wonder, "If Jesus returned to earth years after his death would he even have recognized the followers or ideals of what he taught. Or would he have looked at Paul and said "Ahhh Man! Paul, what the f!!k did you do!?!." 

I don't think Christians of today understand how much of what they believe and do is actually Greek and Roman Philosophy rather than the teachings of Jesus. Jesus was a Jew after all, he was most certainly not a Christian. In fact he never asked people to be titled Christians but rather, simply, to follow him. To refer oneself as Christian would have been absurd in those days. The term Christian is to mean 'follower of Christ' but do "Christians" of today actually follow Christ or do they follow Paul? I think a more fitting term to refer to themselves, rather than Christians, would be "Paulanity" the 'followers of Paul'. 

In my opinion I think Paul has gotten the better of Jesus, despite how buff Jesus looks.

Tuesday, September 1, 2015


I used to be of the Christian mindset that woman was made from man, for man. I prayed and searched for a woman that was a godly, pure, and most importantly submissive; all the things a woman of God should be, right?

Well, things did not work out as I had planned, instead of a submissive woman I married a Fiery woman, instead of a pure woman I married a Real woman and instead of marrying a God like woman I married a Goddess. So glad my wife did not click "submit". I see many Christian women stifle their desires, their wishes and/or pursuits for the will of their husbands. "All hail the King".

My advice to women do not click submit! My advice to men, do not be dicks by making your wife submit.

Sunday, August 30, 2015

The Face of Religious Terror

(I discovered this at thesuperstitiousnakedape blog. Click on the link to discover a wonderful world of thought, dialogue and fun. When I think of John Zande and his "The Superstitious Naked Ape" blog I can think of only one word that suits it best, "Classic". Seriously though check out his blog, browse through his posts and take a look at his new book The Owner of All Infernal Names: An Introduct…)

I will admit, it took me awhile to figure this one out (My excuse was that it was late at night). I kept reading the words thinking the answer was in the words but when I looked at this in its entirety then I finally understood. It was like an Ah-ha moment, and when the scales from my eyes were removed I could finally see. 

Do you get it? What do you see?

Tuesday, May 26, 2015

"It is dangerous to be right when the government is wrong"

"It is dangerous to be right when the government is wrong"

We live in a time and place where we have come excessively close to losing a healthy perspective on law, law enforcement and government. We often forget why these institutions exist in the first place, and I fear these institutions have forgotten as well, or even worse, have purposely set this knowledge to the way side in order to accomplish set goals. 

If you were to refuse an officer of the law's demand to be searched even if you were completely innocent you would most likely face criminal charges. If they insisted and physically forced a search against your will and you resisted by pushing the officer's approach aside (not even violently), you would face charges for assaulting an officer. They can push you around, but you are not allowed to even defend yourself without facing consequences. So, tell me this who's rights supersede the others? 

Is the law above the individual, or is the law for the purpose of the individual? 
Or is the law above the individual but subservient to the populace? 
When you see an officer of the law, do you fear consequences of any shape, form or kind? 
Should the people to be subservient to the government, or the government subservient to the people?